Monday, November 1, 2010

Never been a fan of surprises...

Dateline: All Hallow's Eve 3:21am

I am awakened by a pain akin to a knife in my Achilles. This is new, this is unexpected.
One week to the date before my scheduled reconstruction, a new tendon shears.
...and baby makes three.

It's now 5:19 November 1st
I am breathless as I write this, and even the dos percos aren't doing much but making me grouchy and demanding.
I want my surgeon, and I want him now.
The nurses are, at least in theory, trying to find me a spot in an already overbooked lineup of weekend yard injuries.

The urge to vomit is overwhelming, but my body is so tense it won't allow the disgust.
My TENS unit (transdermal electric nerve stimulator) is amped up, but not doing any good.
I can't feel the icepacks.
Not an encouraging sign.

It's like waiting for a call from your first real love, and they aren't calling.
The lump in my throat is choking, and I have to keep reminding myself to breathe.
My phone is my lifeline. Silent and impotent.
The perco bottle is empty.

Shitsandwich.
Please, God, help me.
Please, God, help.

5 comments:

  1. ((((hugsprayershealingenergy))))

    I am so sorry you are hurting so badly. I hope you find relief soon. Keep breathing in and out. In, and out.

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  2. I love your spirit, and your strength. I'm here for you!

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  3. Just read this now, Erin.. So sorry you are in such pain and frustration. Thank you for shedding light on this condition, it is one of several I'm learning about in the last few years. I realize you must hear it often, but truly, I am local, and if I can help at all, I'd be honored. Maybe some Pumpkin Izzy's sometime?

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  4. Erin,
    I appreciate this very candid look into your life and struggles. I can't imagine the pain you're experiencing. There is tremendous strength you show by bringing it out into the open and I pray that you will have better days ahead. You are amazing!

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  5. You are in my thoughts EH! Sending lots of love your way!

    -Erin Milbrandt

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I welcome you to add comments, suggestions and resources you think may be helpful for those with EDS, and always appreciate your thoughts and prayers.